Gentle Readers, if you are ever in a situation where somebody offers you the opportunity to buy the floor sample of a discontinued $2000 mattress at a discounted rate of 50% standard retail value...take it and run like the wind. Yesterday my mattress arrived at my apartment in all its promised glory. Oh. my. god. It is like sleeping on a bed of clouds...very supportive clouds.

However, before going to bed I went (by myself) to see The March of the Penguins, in Kentucky. First off, the place I went was called Newport on the Levee; a recently constructed mall-type plaza on the Ohio river including the Newport Aquarium, a movie theatre, Claddaugh Irish Pub, Mitchells Fish Market, Johnny Rockets, American Eagle....wait, did I just go to Eastwood Towne Center? There were more annoying teenagers than I have seen in recent history, all just taking up space and pushing each other around. There were even some sidewalk performers which I decided to *not* stay and watch. (You know, too embarrassed for them.)

I saw the movie, which I thought was good, cute, interesting, informative, but it could have very easily been something I saw on the Discovery Channel for free. Speaking of free, you know what is not free? Parking. I had to pay $5 just to park my car! Also, movie tickets in Kentucky are $9! Eeeek! Is it like that everywhere? I don't remember movies being so expensive.

I am disappointed though, because I learned that as I was enjoying my movie, I could have gone down to the river to see Vanilla Ice performing for free at the Great Inland Seafood festival. Hindsight is a bitch, huh? Just a few hundred meters away and I could have been enjoying the sweet, sweet musings of Vanilla Ice.

When I arrived home, I went to unlock the gate to my apartment's alley and it wouldn't fit into the keyhole. I checked a few times, and it was the right key, and then I noticed that the key was bent. Without this key I was unable to get into my building. I tried calling Todd, who was at a Hip Hop Music Festival (I know, I know, stop laughing...that's why *I* went to the movie by myself) and our conversation went like this:
Todd: Hello?
Kim: I have a problem!
Todd: I can't really hear you!
Kim: I have a problem...my key won't work, I can't get into the apartment!
Todd: Okay, I love you, I'll see you later!
Kim: No, no, no, no, no! I need you to come home! I can't get in the apartment!
Todd: I'll be home at about 2, I'll call you then, bye!
Kim: Bye....

Plan B was to buzz one of my neighbors (who I have yet to meet) and try to get them to let me in. This plan worked, although I felt really bad because while most people are awake at midnight on a friday, some are not. So I made it into the apartment alright.

Today Todd and I woke up at a leisurely 9:00 and discussed our options for today. (Because there is so much to do in Cinci!) We decided to go to the Great Inland Seafood Festival, even though there was little chance we would meet Vanilla Ice. We thought we were being all clever because we were going to park in Ohio and walk on the "Purple People Bridge" over to Kentucky so we wouldn't have to pay for parking. Well those damn Ohioans aren't as stupid as they look and we STILL had to pay $5 for parking, AND we had to walk. The festival was more "mediocre" than "great" although you could buy a Fresh Maine Lobster (cooked and everything) for $9.95. We opted for the crabmeat stuffed jumbo shrimp and dirty rice, which was very yummy. While the food prices were pretty good, but they got you on the drink prices. $3 for a bottle of water, give me a break! But alas, the temperature topped at 100 and that is not including the awful, oppressive humidity, so we caved in, multiple times. We walked around Barnes and Noble where I challenged Todd to tell me the last book he read for pleasure that was written by a woman...even despite his protests he didn't answer me ...because he didn't remember. So I made him buy the book, written by a woman, that he was trying to get me to buy and read. We trekked across the bridge again, bringing over priced water for our journey, and when we arrived home, we collapsed on our mattress and zonked out for 2 hours.

That heat takes a lot out of you.

P.S. If you are reading this, and I know some of you are, please leave me messages! I want to know if anybody is enjoying reading this as much as I am enjoying writing it.