Today was a bad day. You know you have reached a low point in your life when the Thursday night TV lineup is the high point of your day. (On second thought, make that week.)

I don't really have a sense of humor about this whole unemployment thing anymore. If anybody asks about the job hunt, even in the kindest way possible, the tears start welling up. I went the my second NOW meeting, and one of the kindest old ladies asked about my employment situation (she remembered that I was looking). I started to get so teary eyed that I had to turn away and excuse myself. I think I must have an allergic reaction to the words, "Job," "Career," and "Employment" because even typing them is making me cry. I know people are trying to make me feel better by saying things like, "we've all been there, I was unemployed for a year and a half," but you know what, that doesn't make me feel better, that makes me scared, because I CAN'T be unemployed for a year and a half. If I turn 23 without a full time job and health benefits, I will kill myself. I will swallow 34 tylenol, I will slit my wrists the long way up my arm, and I will hang myself on the ceiling fan. I'll do it, I swear! So help me, when I finally get a job and I am talking to somebody who is looking for work, I will not tell them how long I was looking for work, because they only makes me feel more and more terrified.

Here is an interesting fact about people in Ohio, or at least people in Cincinnati. If you are talking to them and they can't understand what you are saying, they will say, "PLEASE?" really loudly. This sounds very rude to my ears because they will interrupt you to say "PLEASE?" In Michigan people would generally say, "Pardon me?" or "Excuse me?" or "Could you speak up?" or "I didn't understand what you said." At first I thought the only person who did this was was my weird, racist boss at the shoe store, but then I realized that it was everybody in Cincinnati. Todd, however, has not noticed it. I say that is because he is so articulate and speaks so powerfully.

As I mentioned earlier, I have been going to the Cincinnati NOW meetings, and I was invited to go to the planning meeting in two weeks. They asked me to write an article for the Cinci NOW Newsletter, and while I know they would accept anything that anybody was willing to write, I am very geeked about it. Since I don't know much about feminism or women's issues in Cincinnati, I was thinking of writing an article about what it is like to be a young feminist, and how feminism is viewed in my generation. I think that could be interesting for anybody to read, young or old. Perhaps I could persuade them to publish my resume if I bought some ad space.

The last weekend in October my sisters Dana (from MI) and Monique (From CA) are coming to visit me for three whole nights! I hope that my hostessing skills are up to par. I think I might order a cake for the occasion, mostly because I want to eat another cake from "Take the Cake," the bakery down the street.

In local news, the Cincinnati Bengals are surprisingly undefeated this season, and ranked first I believe. This is prompting locals to break out into chants of "WHO DEY" at any time. For those of you who are not blessed to be living in Cincinnati, "WHO DEY" is the Bengals signature chant, much like "GO GREEN! GO WHITE!" I, too, was perplexed when I first moved here, but quickly learned that "WHO DEY!" is short for "WHO DEY THINK GONNA BEAT DEM BENGALS?" It truly is, the stupidest chant I have ever heard, with "WHAT DO WE WANT?" "TITS!" "WHEN DO WE WANT THEM?" "NOW!" coming in a close second.