The greatest thing that has happened to me in recent times is that NBC has started airing Project Runway on Monday nights. If there was one reason to get cable, it was Project Runway. Now I don't have to buy cable, and I get to watch my favorite show. Now if only a network station will pick up The Daily Show I'll be all set.

I think I need to get out more.

You see, I've had so little energy lately I don't even feel like doing the most basic household chores. Todd has been wonderful at doing the laundry.

I just realized that it is July 3oth and I did not go to the gym at all this month. I spent $53 on my monthly membership and didn't go at all. I had better go tomorrow or I will feel like a total sloth.

My wedding dress came in the mail. I had it delivered to work and when I went to pick it up from the front desk my co-worker did not believe that my wedding dress would fit into a package that small. When I tried it on, I have to admit, I was disappointed. A part of my was expecting it to be perfect, and it didn't quite live up to my expectations. Oh, well. I'm going to keep it anyway. It will require some minor alterations on the shoulders but I think it will look fine. No need to spend a lot of time dwelling on a dress, right? I've never really felt the need to look like a sparkly princess fairy.

I've been feeling really depressed about the wedding lately - but not depressed about marrying Todd. I just kind of wish that we had just eloped. Unfortunately, I think it's too late for that. We have too many deposits down at this point. The day just seems so far away and I'm feeling a lot of negativity from my mom. My sister Nicole has not said a single thing to me about the wedding since I got engaged. Not that I really expect anything from her. My mom is sending e-mails to relatives saying that I am "driving her crazy with my unconventional wedding." (How do I know this? She forwarded me an e-mail with her original e-mail still attached at the bottom. How very kind of her.) I've made the decision that since my mom cannot omit positive feelings towards me for any occasion, I will just tell her what time to show up on the wedding day. It still doesn't help me feel any better though. I don't know why I always let my mom disappoint me. My expectations of her aren't very high, but she constantly disappoints me. When Todd and I first got engaged and we were deciding upon a date my mom was upset that we were waiting so long. Last week she just told me that she thinks we are too young to be getting married. I can't win! I am convinced that even if I was 26 and getting married in a Catholic church with a perfectly modest dress poufy white dress that only cost $59 and a bouquet of red roses and a reception at a cheesy reception hall with a huge buffet of Polish cuisine she would find a fault with something.

Oh, and Todd's dealing with the caterer so any problems my mom has with the menu she is going to have to take it up with Todd. My mom has a problem with garlic and lemon among many other common spices. She WILL have a problem with the menu.