The weather in Cinci is pretty much the most hellacious I've ever experienced. Now that it's July, the humidity is off it's rocker. Worst thing about it is that the humidity really ripens the scent of urine through the city. It's pretty gross.

With this oppressive summer weather comes a tendency to act out violently. My favorite Cincinnati public figure had been on TV a lot lately. His name is O'Dell Owens and he is the county coroner. He is a total superstar, the best county coroner ever. You think I'm kidding, but I would TOTALLY work on his campaign. You think I'm kidding about this, but I'm really not. I have a lot of respect for this guy. Apparently I'm not alone:
http://www.citybeat.com/2005-07-06/cover.shtml
http://en.thinkexist.com/quotes/dr._o

He went to Antioch College AND Yale Medical School. He is really outspoken about the drug problem. He also uses his platform as a public figure to promote downtown development and Over the Rhine Development. There are a lot of mysterious deaths and murders in Cincinnati so it seems like O'dell always has a valuable point to contribute. Most recently a man died in police custody after a taser was used. O'dell Owens performed an autopsy and discovered that the man had the second highest levels of crack in his system that the office had ever seen, therefore it was the crack, not the taser that killed him. He was quoted on the news saying in a really bad-ass tone: "If people continue to use drugs, they’ll end up coming to my house, the coroners office."

The most recent breaking news story in Cincinnati is that a police officer was shot. A re-run of Everybody Loves Raymond (Todd's favorite show, I'm not kidding) was interrupted by "breaking news" news of this story. A police officer was shot by a 17 year old in a nearby neighborhood. (Not mine for a change!) After three "breaking news" interruptions turns out the police officer is going to be okay. He was wearing a bullet proof vest so his belly is just a widdle bit bwoosed. Sorry, no disrespect, but the first reports were that this guy was in critical condition. They actually instructed viewers to PRAY for this guy. And he's okay in the end. Musta been all the prayers.

ANYWAY. What would cause a 17 year old to shoot a police officer you ask? The police officer was writing this guy up for littering and the kid SHOT him. Todd has come up with an artists rendition of the conversation leading up to the shooting:
Cop: Hey, you, troublemaker! Pick up that candy wrapper you just dropped.
Kid: No!
Cop: That littering, it is against the law, pick it up you hooligan!
Kid: NO! I do what I want. I'll litter when I want to and no cop is going to tell me what to do.
Cop: I'm afraid you've given me no choice but to write you a citation.
Kid: Eat lead, pig!

End scene