Here are some scary Todd pictures...I love my camera!

In the news today: Dog the Bounty Hunter is coming to Cinci to help track down a triple murder suspect.

I got a collect phone call from prison today, of course I didn't accept it.

I also got a virus via AIM. I certainly suck! If you get a suspiciouos IM from me with a link in it, don't click on it. Damn, and McAfee can't do anything to fix it!

I went for a walk today in Eden Park on top of Mt. Adams. Today is the first day that feels like fall, so I had to get outside. I didn't think that the park was very pedestrian friendly, there were sidewalks on the side of the road, but not much else. The park smelled so good and earthy, I can't wait to go back when the leaves start to change colors. This is the view of the Ohio River; Cincinnati is so hilly and green. It really is a pretty city.

What the hell are these things? They were all over the ground in the park.

Here are the beautiful flowers from Todd...which I had to put in my blender.

Here is a picture of my street: (You can see Kentucky in the distance)

I went to the shoe store to work today, and it went much better than my first day. I actually sold $700 worth of shoes in only 5 hours. (Yay commission!) The only bad thing that happened, was that it was revealed that my boss is a giant racist. Oh yeah, big time. He actually said, completely unprompted: "You know, the problem is that she is an Oriental. (the customer that just left the store) The most annoying customers are the Orientals and the Indians." My jaw literally dropped. I mean, WHAT was I supposed to say to that? "Oh, yeah, I hate those yellow people, too." So aside from being really uncomfortable about that statement, and a co-worker's statement about her disapproval of the feminist movement, oh, and the two pictures of George W. Bush in the back room, I like it.

Thanks to everyone who sent me birthday wishes yesterday. I was out and about all day, so I didn't have much of a chance to respond. I decided to knit my new camera a case rather than buy a hideous black case from the store. I went and bought some fabric and blue cotton yarn. I don't really know how it is going to turn out, but I suppose it will be a learning experience. I would post more pictures, but I can't get blogger to upload them. I suppose the first ones I posted were beginners luck.

Todd took me out to eat for my birthday dinner; we went to the Bonefish Grill. I was very disappointed to learn that it is a chain restaurant, as I have been trying to support independent places lately. Other than that, it was lovely, and the food was delicious.

I've been meaning to write about my job at the shoe store. I thought that the Cobblers Bench decor was outdated and tacky. The combination of the pink carpet, the hunter green accessories, the flowered tapestry chairs and the yellow wood paneling, certainly showed it's age. Well, the decor is Head over Heels is: burnt orange and hunter green with bamboo furniture. Eww. My first reaction when I walked in the back room was "holy shit." It makes me fantasize about the Cobblers Bench. The shelves of shoes were about 18 inches apart, just enough room to squeeze down the aisles, and went all the way to the ceiling (about 10 feet). The shoe brands were not located together, and I couldn't seem to figure out any logic to the madness of the stock room. The shoes in the front of the store generally had the price on them, but did not have the name of the specific style of shoe on them. This made finding shoes literally like finding a needle in a haystack. Finally, I said, "oh, I think I see how the back room is organized. The shoes that are clumped together in the front are located next to each other in the back. The owner stared at me blankly and said, "no. if that's the case, it's unintentional." So I responded, "Oh. Then what is the method to the stock room." He said, "There isn't any." Oh. my. God. This is going to be so difficult. I can't believe I am saying this, but, I want the Cobblers Bench back! Waaaaa!

I went to the Cincinnati Museum Center this morning, and I start volunteering on Friday! I get free passes to all of the museums and the Omnimax Theater for me and up to five guests at a time. The woman who I spoke with also told me that as a volunteer I would be considered an "internal candidate" for any jobs that become available. I would love to work there...

On my way back I stopped at an ATM and as I was pulling out of the driveway a guy in the passengers seat of a pick-up truck hung his head out the window and hollered. I don't know what he said, as my window was rolled up, but I have an idea. Honestly, where do these guys get off thinking that a girl in a somewhat nice car, wearing nice clothes, is going to want to go out with you? You aren't wearing a shirt, there is more rust on your car than paint, and worst of all, you have a dirtstache. That's not hot, and that doesn't impress me.

However, on a positive note, I heard two of my favorite oldies on the radio today: "You're so Vain," and "Love is kind of crazy with a spooky little girl like you...Spoookay!"

Happy Birthday to me!

Thanks to Todd and his 'rents for buying me this loverly digital camera for my 22nd birthday. Per usual, I couldn't wait until my birthday to start playing with my new toy.

As promised, here is a picture of my apartment in Cincinnati, and the view from my front window. Sometimes we see people doing Yoga on the patio across the street.

Todd and I went to see the band "Clap Your Hands Say Yeah" last night in Kentucky. While there, I noticed a girl across the room who was clearly pregnant, maybe about 5 months. She looked young, perhaps younger than me, and I began to think about her life, and if she was married, or if this was a planned pregnancy. I guess I just don't see young pregnant women in bars too often. Then...she lit up a cigarette. Just when I was judging her in my mind for the horrors of smoking while pregnant...a guy went over to her and handed her a can of Pabst Blue Ribbon. So there she was, clearly pregnant, smoking a cigarette and drinking PBR from a CAN! How tacky.

Oh, Kentucky. *sigh*

Here is the the longest conversation that I have had with my sister in about 7 years:
(This is unedited)

And then the: Hi Nicole, how are you?
PixiEsticks41: fine
And then the: How do you like your new job?
PixiEsticks41: i like it a lot
And then the: Do you work with any of these people? http://longshotsbarandgrill.net/ladies.htm
PixiEsticks41: no
And then the: huh? Did they all get fired?
And then the: When do you get your picture on the website? Have you picked out the lingerie you are going to wear yet?
PixiEsticks41: fuck off bitch
And then the: Wow, hostile much?

No response after that. Bwaaahaaahhahhaaaa! I love it, "fuck off bitch."

I mean, if you are going to work in a place like that, at least have a sense of humor about it!

I went to an interview today with an insurance company. You know that means I am desprate. The only reason I went was because they called me and asked me to come in for an interview; I thought I'd go and give it a chance.

When I walked in, the secretary was about 19 and wearing black stretchy party pants with a biggest red sweatshit ever. It seriously hung down to her knees. After greeting me, she walked into an office and started to talk about placentas really loudly. I saw other people bustling around the office, all of them were men. I began to think, gee, this is a place I would NOT want to work. Then another woman walked into the office from her lunch break, I presume. She was dressed fine except for her pink glittery thong that was hanging out of her pants! When the secretary told her than her underwear was showing, she adjusted, and it was still sticking out. Good lord! I would have to make a LOT of money to want to work in that office.

The interview went well, probably because my underwear wasn't showing, and they asked me to come in for a second interview on wednesday. I'm going to give it a shot, and I can always turn them down or quit if I hate it. Uhhhg. What is my life coming to?

Arrrrg! Happy International Talk Like a Pirate Day!

My pirate name is:

Captain Bess Bonney

Even though there's no legal rank on a pirate ship, everyone recognizes you're the one in charge. You can be a little bit unpredictable, but a pirate's life is far from full of certainties, so that fits in pretty well. Arr!

Get your own pirate name from fidius.org.

http://talklikeapirate.com/piratehome.html

What a pleasant surprise to learn that in Cincinnati, they celebrate Oktoberfest in September. Unfortunately Todd and I missed the ceremonious tapping of the kegs and beer barrel roll this morning. We purposely decided to wait until AFTER the World's Largest Chicken Dance to head down to Fifth Street. Walking down Main Street we were asked for money by three different panhandlers, who must have been having a field day approaching all the white drunk people who were walking away from Oktoberfest Zinzinnati. Before we even arrived on Fifth street (they closed down 7 whole blocks for this shindig) I spotted my first Chicken Hat. In traditional German culture their are the well known cultural icons, such as lederhosen, schnitzel, beer, beer wenches, accordion music, and then the lesser known tokens such as chicken hats and Vince Neil performing the chicken dance.

Cincinnati, or Zinzinnati as it is called this weekend, is out of its mind, absurdly crazy for Oktoberfest. Todd and I ate: a German Pretzel, Potato Pancakes, a Lebanese inspired bratwurst, roasted almonds and Cherry Strudel. We listened to the Chicken Dance, the Beer Barrel Polka and the Shes-Too-Fat Polka. (Which goes: "i don't want her, you can have her she's too fat for me, hey!) We saw more Lederhosen than we can count, along with women in traditional Bavarian inspired costumes. There were people drinking out of decorative beer steins and plastic Miller Lite cups. I wish I had a camera to take a pictures of the insanity we saw today. The best part is that we can go back tomorrow and see some more!

My sister is a Longshots Bikini Girl. She works here:
http://longshotsbarandgrill.net/index.html

No picture of her yet. I am brimming with pride.

How did we come from the same family?

Yesterday I went to the Cinicinnati NOW meeting. The topic of the meeting was Wal-Mart, and I am very excited to have a feminist community to interact with. All the women were much older than me, one of them told me she has been active in Cincinnati NOW since 1972! Everybody has cool jobs, too. One works for the Cincinnati Housing Coalition, one is a nurse in an abortion clinic, a couple worked as Union organizers. The vice president told me that in a joking manner that if I stuck around for a few meetings, they would give me a title. I've already offered to write articles for the newsletter.

One of the women gave me the names of two people to contact about jobs; they are the executive director of the YWCA and the Rape Crisis and Abuse Center. I have contacted one of them who told me about two jobs, although they are going to make a decision soon, I submitted my resume, but I am not going to get my hopes up. (Although I know they should hire me.)

I went to a shoe store in Hyde Park today and that looks promising as a part-time job. I also got up the courage to go to the Realtor down the street and gave them a resume, telling them that I was interested in learning more about Real Estate in Cincinnati and if there were any job openings, to consider me. They seemed somewhat interested, but they could have been being nice.

Later this week I have my bookclub meeting. I getting nervous since it is my turn to choose a book, and I don't really know what to choose. Any suggestions?

Cincinnati is a very large city, but it has a relatively small downtown (think Detroit). I've started to recognize the homeless people that I see when I walk downtown and those who live on my street. It's too bad that I don't know their names, but I'm begining to create names for some of them. Many of them keep to themselves, with their shopping carts, and those are the ones with severe mental illness. They are usually spotted yelling at nobody. My favorite is a woman who wears orange shorts.

Then there are the people who stop you to ask for money. They are sneaky, they ask for 50 cents, or a dollar for something to eat, and then ask for more when they see you open your wallet. They say, I am trying to get on a bus. But they look like people who are not planning to get on any bus anytime soon. I don't know what to say, because I don't want to get into the habit of giving away my dwindling savings, and yet, I can't say "I don't have any money" because clearly, I have money. I just want to turn to them and say, "I don't have a job either. I can't help you, buddy." But I don't really think that quickly. I'm thinking of compiling a pamphlet of services for the homeless in Cinci and handing it to people who ask for money.

The Cinci mayoral campaign is picking up as election day is this week. I was quite nervous because I didn't know who to vote for. David Pepper has an awful lot of TV ads, and while I know he is a democrat, he just seems so...white. I get the feeling from his ads that he hates downtown Cinci, and I even noticed a nearby block on his TV ad about shutting down crack-houses. I guess I just get a bad vibe from him.

Charlie Winburn is black, but his tv ads are so bad that I don't want to vote for him on that principle alone. They don't make any sense. In fact, one of his ads says this (verbatem): It seems like every community has a bullet with its name on it, and city officals are helpless in stopping crime. Once Charlie Winburn is elected the only thing criminals will shoot off is their mouths, behind bars. Whaaaa? Then there is another, where he says that he has a lot invested in Cincinnati because it is where he met his wife, and he has had to "fight for a place at the table." Whaaa? These make no sense. When I learned he was a Republican, and a Minister, it all began to make sense.

I saw one ad for Alicia Reece, and she seemed very promising. She is currently the Vice-Mayor of Cincinnati and has been on city council for a while. I haven't really seen much about her, other than the one ad, and everything else I hear is really bad. Seems like she is getting elected because of the family name (family of career politicians). I have to take these with a grain of salt though, because Cinci is a very racist and sexist city from what I have heard, so who knows if she is just being criticized because she is a powerful and successful black woman.

I thought that was it for candidates until I watched a local news show this morning that had a panel with all the major party candidates and that included Mark Mallory. He is currently a state senator, and the Assistant Minority Leader for the Democratic Party in the Senate. During this debate he kept out of the bickering the other three were engaged in, kept out of the blame game, and kept a level head. Perhaps that is because his experience is on the state level, and not the drama of city politics, but I am excited to vote for him.

The way I see it, I have two options right now. 1) Start applying for jobs outside of Cincinnati. 2) Kill myself.

I'm really starting to get pissed off. Do you mean to tell me that in this entire city, and out of the 50 or so resumes I have sent out, that there is not a single person who thinks I am worthy of being hired? Because if that's the case I have found the city of overachievers. Why did I just bust my ass over the last 4 years, hell, 8 years, to be getting such crappy treatment by potential employers?

It is so unprofessional to call and cancel an interview 90 minutes before the interview, then not leave a number and never call back to reschedule. It is insulting to be hired by a temp agency only to get the run around ever week when you call asking for a placement. Believe me, Janelle, I am quite qualified to do any job you send me on, hell, I could do your job ten times better than you, and I am getting quite sick of your excuses. I am sick of going to interviews and never hearing back from them and constantly getting voicemails when I call to follow up. Amazingly, Saks Fifth Avenue was the most professional place I have dealt with...a RETAIL store!

I came to the realization last night that I am not going to meet my goal of being employed by my birthday, which is now 15 days away. That is a really hard thing to come to terms with. All I want for my birthday is a stable income that isn't insulting.

To top it all off, I have a pimple in my ear, and it hurts.

Any word of encouragement...about the job or the pimple...would be appreciated. I changed my settings so anybody can leave a post.

Todd is going to kill me for writing this, but as it now affects my life, I feel as though I have a right to post it. Todd has had a cyst growing on his back, right along his spine where the neck meets the back for, oh, about the last 5 months. It has recently become infected and painful, so he went to the doctor, which is how we now know it is a cyst. A surgeon cut it open today and drained it; rather than stitch it closed, he left the incision open and bandaged. Here is where I come in. Every morning for the next 7 - 10 days I have to wake up at 7:00am in order to unbandage the wound, remove the bloody gauze, and stuff clean gauze into the open wound until it heals. Todd said...I hope you have tweezers.

Yes I have tweezers, but I use them on my eyebrows, not your bloody, puss-filled open wound damnit!

Could my life get any worse right now?

Yes, I suppose it could.

I spoke with the director of the Women's Center at University of Cincinnati today. She told me about a job they are going to be creating in order to reach out to underrepresented women...women of color, women with disabilities, lesbians, women with children and international women. She encouraged me to apply for this job...however, 1) how could I ever get this job being none of the above, and 2) if by some occurrence I did get the offer, how could I ever take it knowing that I am none of the above. Just when I get my hopes up...

Yesterday Todd and I went down to Coopers to have dinner. We dined next to a man wearing a shirt with not only one, but two confederate flags on it. Cincinnati, you are so classy.

I got an e-mail from Todd's dad today; it was a series of correspondence he had been having with some people from University of Cincinnati. The final e-mail was from the director of the Women's Resource Center who said, "have her give me a call, we have some positions she might be interested in." Hell yeah I'm interested!

I called, left a message...hopefully I will hear back soon...I am going crazy waiting!

I also finally got my act together and called the Museum Center about volunteer opportunities. The woman was very excited to hear from me and told me about all the ways I can be involved. I am hoping this could turn into a real live job...although that wouldn't be possible for a while.

Hurray about possibilities! I was getting depressed applying for all these crap jobs I don't really want...like working for Coca Cola, Proctor and Gamble and auto manufacturing companies.

I also must report that Cincinnati officially has the worst pizza in the universe. Thank god for Pizza Hut, because other than that, Todd and I have found NO GOOD PIZZA in the entire city.

Also, blogger, or blogspot is on my shit-list because they do not have a way to search for users...at least not a way that I can figure out.

I'm back in the Natti...much later than expected. The reason is because Todd and I got a flat tire! Woo Hoo!

If I owned a tire store...and I am thinking of opening one up...I would be open on Labor Day, because you would control the entire market for that day! Why, oh why would most tire stores *not* be open on one of the busiest driving holidays of the year? It's not like it's Christmas or anything.

It's a good thing that man with no teeth stopped to help us get the spare tire on because we probably would have just cried if he hadn't. It's also a good thing my Uncle Bob walked into my house in Farmington at 5:00 and suggested we go to Sams Club even though they weren't accepting any new customers and closed at 6:00.

We thought we might have two bits of car trouble when we ran over the carcass of a semi tire that was blown out and in the middle of the road, but we prevailed, unscathed, except for a flap of plastic that was hanging down on the underbelly of the car. The car in front of us got a big dent and needed a new fender...he he. It was quite scary, those tires sounds like you are like running over a big piece of metal.

My weekend went a zillion times better than I expected. My mom and dad actually HUGGED me, and I can't remember the last time they did that. How weird....

I had a terrible nightmare last night. I dreamed that I was caught in a flooded house during a hurricane. (I wonder where I got that idea for a dream) It was so vivid, and my fear was so intense that when I woke up and had to remember where I really was. I feel compelled to bring somebody into my home, but I know that it would not work out. My apartment has one bedroom with no doors, no privacy, no couch to sleep on. I just wish I had something to give. I have no money to donate, but perhaps I can join one of those crews that are going down to volunteer. I have plenty of time....

By the way, if there is one good thing to arise from this hurricane, (and I don't mean to minimize the situation) is that Bush is being heavily criticized in Mississippi, Alabama and Louisiana. When Bush is being criticized there, you know he is deep shit.

It is interesting to witness how quickly the blame game occurs, and how much it is perpetuated by the news. Politics truly is a spectator sport.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20050831/od_uk_nm/oukoe_uk_safrica_rape

HAHAHAHAHA!

Wonderful! I just wonder why I didn't think of this first?

Today I am listening to a book on tape, because it is my 94th birthday. It's not really my birthday, at least not for another 26 days. Actually, I went to the library and borrowed some books on tape (actual tape! It's been a long time since I have used my tape deck) for my long car journey back to Michigan this weekend. Todd becomes the music nazi when we are driving, and refuses to let me play any of my music, so I am cutting him off and playing books on tape. I decided to listen to a little bit of one to see if I liked it, and I really like it! I am on side two of tape 3, so I suppose this one will not be played on the car journey...as I do not want to go back three hours.

I am going to Michigan this weekend for my second cousin Jane's wedding. As Todd and I will be in Michigan, we are obliged to see his family. This means that we are driving from Cinci to Farmington to Crystal (an hour north of Lansing) to Grand Rapids to Cinci. I spoke with my mom yesterday and she asked if I was still coming. Of course, I replied. She said, well, with gas so expensive, I just didn't know if you could afford it.

There are many things wrong with this comment.

First: If I was getting married, I would be so offended if somebody RSVP's to say they would be in attendance, and then at the last minute decided not to come because gas went up 30 cents. When you make a commitment, to something important like a wedding, you follow through on your committeeman. It makes me wonder if my mom is going to bail out on my wedding, because gas prices are so expensive.

Second: A kind set of parents would understand that I am going through a tight financial situation and say, since this is a family member's wedding, and you are going through all the trouble of driving 4 1/2 hours to get here, we will give you a bit of money for gas. I mean, I would do that, instead of saying, gas is expensive, so you shouldn't come, never mind that I am not going to see you until Christmas.

My dad once told me that he didn't worry about me, because he knew I was going to be fine in life. If my mom's sentiments about me are similar, then it would explain how she treats me. I just feel so ignored. I've spent my whole life trying to get my parents attention, and it's seems like it is torture for them to show me a shred of acknowledgement that I am even alive. I mean, I can't remember the last time my dad actually *asked* me how I was doing, or what was going on in my life, and I don't think he has *ever* called me since I have gone away to school four years ago. My mom always treats me like it is so much of a hassle to remember to call me, let alone visit me. And when I do manange to contact her, she can't be happy for my happiness, excitement or anything. As if, expressing happiness for me is just admitting her own depression.

Sometimes I wonder how such bizarro parents created such a wonderful, productive member of society.